A day at the Zoo with Monkey Boy !!!

Hi, I'm Jack

Me and Grandma Jenny went to Hogle Zoo

She got me a wagon and some really healthy snacks... Doritos and Rootbeer hee, hee

We first passed the Llama's where grandma

asked me if my momma was a llama?

I just scrunched my face and said "NOooo".

We saw two Tigers that looked very hungry!

I showed Grandma where the camels are

I tried to climb through the fence to get closer

Grandma was a party poop and wouldn't let me!!!

I had to go pee pee so I did

Then we washed our hands

Then we dried them and dried them and dried them

Until Grandma said they were way more then dry!!!

I told Grandma Jenny that I wanted to ride on the Elephant

so when the ride stopped

we ran really fast so we could be the first ones on it!!!!!

We gave ourselves a thumbs up for being fast as lightning!!!

We got back in the wagon where our chips and soda were waiting for us

We tried to look for the monkeys but we couldn't see any.

Grandma said, "maybe they're inside"

Let's go see!

We measured me and decided I was the size of a juvenile monkey.

Grandma said, " come on Monkey boy, lets go inside".

I climb a lot and I don't get scared that is why

she thinks I'm a monkey!

I stopped to say HI to Mowgli :)

Where are the Gorilla's Grandma? There they are, right there!!!

WE were at the zoo so long that we turned into wild animals!!!

I wasn't even scared to ride on wild tigers******* I was a Dorito munching Chinese boy!

Grandma made me try on a few more things because she thought I was so cute but then I said

NO MORE HATS!!!!

Then we were off to see the Rhino's that were in the area

clearly marked ... ELEPHANT ENCOUNTER

It's a good thing monkey boy can't read or I would have been way confused!!!

PEE PEE TIME AGAIN...

Grandma SHOWED me the sign that means Restroom

I pointed to the sign and said that's a girl sitting on the potty!

Grandma asked me to jump back in the wagon so she could pull me up the hill and I said no, I want to do it . So she said okay and she jumped in the wagon and said it's your turn to pull me!!!

Grandma looked very comfortable sitting in the wagon but it was too hard!

After grunting a few times I kindly asked her to remove herself from the wagon

by saying in a sweet tone of voice...

GET OUT!!!!

She reminded me to say please....

I said please

She got out

This was much easier...

After two 1/2 hours at the zoo, 3 potty breaks, 1 pair of broken glasses

2 times dropping my flip flops out of the wagon, then finding them,

It was time to haul me and the wagon up that hellacious hill to get to the

parking lot! Grandma started talking about the fun we had today but then

the hill got steeper and grandma stopped talking, instead water was coming off her face.

she looked like she was going to have a heart attack but she still kept smiling at me

I laid back in my wagon finishing off the last of my Rootbeer and chips and enjoying the ride.

I got to the top of the hill and I was really, really sad!!!

Grandma thought it was because I didn't want to leave.

Grandma- "Jack what's wrong?"

Jack- wrimdn, eidndn,WA!

Grandma- "what sweetie I can't understand you"?

Jack- I jdiijnch see hdchn

Grandma- listen to grandma, you need to stop crying so grandma knows what

you are saying.

Jack- sniffle, sniffle,, " I didn't get to see that!

Grandma- You didn't get to see what? Jack, we saw all the animals

Jack- not that!

He points to what i'm guessing is the only possible animal in the whole zoo that somehow I missed.

I turn around to see what it is...

We had seen all the animals in the zoo, he wanted to see the machines like

PaPa Wades!!!!!

They were fenced in also. We watched them for ten minutes then went to the car.

But not before dropping Jacks flip flop once...

Then twice...

Before we could get out of the parking lot this little monkey was asleep!

What a fun day I had with you Jackster, Grandma Jenny loves you!!

xoxo

Excuse me Officer, can you help?

Last year Jace would get terrified every time he

heard a police car go by. No matter how many times his mom and everyone else reassured him

that it was okay nothing seemed to work. The next time he would hear a siren, even from a far distance, he would panic and cry.

We wondered if it was because everything that he had seen with officers involved ,was traumatic. He listens and picks up on our emotions when we talk like about Kylee's car wreck, the bus accident and even our reactions when an officer pulls us over. We have had to be very careful what we say

I suggested to Amber that it might help if we took him down to the police station and asked the officers to talk to him so he would see that they were nice.

We took him down to the West Bountiful Police Department. Two of the officers showed him around the station and let him see inside the police car. They even turned the lights on for him!!!! Jace liked that!

The officers told Jace that they were daddies and had little kids just like him. The officers gave Jace pencils and stickers and showed Jace their little pretend police cars on their desk.

Jace seemed very comfortable with them.

From that day on Jace was no longer afraid when he heard sirens go by. He would say that they were his friends!!

Thanks West Bountiful Police Officers!!!!

My Indian Heritage

My friend Royann and I were talking today at work, about how much we loved Cher when we were little girls. We were laughing about how we would put a towel on our head and let it hang down our backs so we could pretend that we had the same long hair as Cher. She immediately went into her reenactment of Cher pretending to flip her hair and moving her head back and forth just right. She even placed the tip of her tongue on her top lip like only Cher could do to make it so cool. I remember practicing that lip action in the mirror while listening to Cher on my little 45 records. The only thing I remember extra that my friend didn't include , was that Cher always had her cheeks sucked in. Royann said that she used to bobbi pin her towels on her head to keep them on while she was pretending to "FLIP" it over each shoulder.

I guess I hadn't thought of that because my hair (towel) went falling off my head about the time that I went to reach for my microphone( hairbrush) seconds before I would break into " I've got you Babe" pretending Sonny was next to me. With my arms folded, I would always look to my right side and towards the floor because that is what Cher did. Sonny was shorter then Cher and I .

It's amazing who you can imagine being when you are at that age. It feels so real!!!

While we were talking about this I kinda started singing the song I remember the most.... Royann kind of looked at me and didn't really jump in and sing along. Now I think I know why....

I will tell you in a minute...

When I was little my dad had told us that we were part Cherokee. That is something that I was very proud of and would share with anyone that would listen. I liked knowing that I was part Indian and it was just really cool because I didn't know anyone else that could make that same claim. No one else at school knew an Indian.

Being part Indian as a child made me proud and besides I could feel it in my blood when Cher would sit on top of her horse in her videos and sing.

I also remember one of my favorite songs by Paul Revere and the Raiders... Cherokee People...

It is such an awesome song!!!! Powerful and it made me even more proud to be part of the Cherokee Nation!!!!

You can hear the song by clicking on the part that is underlined and says

Watch it on YOUTUBE

That song made me want to be Cherokee!!!!

This just might have started the, wearing moccasins, having braids and picking out the Indians from the cowboy and Indian bag phase for me.

I do believe that this is the song I was singing to my friend while we were reenacting Cher so I'm guessing that is why she might have had that "I'm so confused" look on her face.

I had Cher and Paul revere and the Raiders all in one act.

Cher sang "Half Breed" Being Cher's #1 fan I don't know how I was so confused.

Back to my story.... I was born in Texas and I was proud of that too. The rest of my family was not born in the South like I was. I found out that that made me different than the rest of them also. I remember learning in school that I was born in a Confederate state and so that made me a Confederate. The rest of my family were Yankee's. I was proud to go around and say that I was a Confederate!

My mom told me I couldn't say that anymore and that I would be in trouble if I did!!!!

So I went back to saying I was Cherokee.

She let me say that.

Years later after watching "Gone with the Wind" I realized why she didn't want me to say that I was a Confederate. We for sure did not support slavery. I guess I then became a Yankee born in Texas.

In Junior High I went on vacation with my friend Tauni and her family. As we were driving in their station wagon her dad ( Bill Jackson) would point out the red dirt up on the mountains and ask me if I knew why the dirt was so red in certain spots?

I actually had never really noticed or thought about it.

He told me that those were the spots where a lot of Indians were killed during the war!

I believed him, well sort of. It didn't make complete sense to me but somehow because I was part Cherokee it made me take notice of how much red dirt there is on the hillsides. I assumed that it was the Ute tribe since we were in Utah. There was no other explanation why the dirt was red so I went with it! I later tried to trick my own children into believing it but they wouldn't believe me for a second!

Some years ago while at my parents house my dad busted out into laughter and said.....

"Remember when I told you kids you were part Cherokee?" I gave him the "are you serious" look. He told me he was just joking and that we weren't Cherokee. He was laughing so hard!!! He thought he was so funny!

I was reminded that I am really fair skinned and have blue eyes. I guess I had never really wanted to think about that. Maybe I was a "half breed" like Cher sang about.

I told him I knew all along that we weren't Indian. I think I was a little sad to find out that I wasn't.

His comment then was...." but you really are!!!!' and started laughing hysterically again!

My father thinks that he is hysterical when he flip flops whether I am part Indian or not. By the looks of it, I probably will never know if I am 1/4 part or 1/20th. He won't tell me. He just laughs!!!

Once again I find myself in an identity crisis!!!!! As if not knowing my real birthday wasn't enough!!!!

Come on Chief Banta, tell me the truth this time....

Me think you not funny!!!

Me think time for POW WOW!!!

You haven't come this far to fall off the Earth!!!

My friend Ryan shared this song with me tonight.

My dear friend has been diagnosed with cancer.

He is going through chemo right now.

He is strong, he is a fighter and he is loved!

He's an inspiration to us all, especially me, he is my friend!

This song hopefully might help someone else. It seems everyday I hear of another person that is dealing with...

Disease

Loss of employment

Loss of a child

Domestic abuse and dealing with it alone

Miscarriages

Wars

Divorce

Loneliness

Homelessness

Mental illness

Infertility

Fear

Death

Depression

Pain

Addiction

I wish it could be different, it can't . Life can be so challenging and I can't help but wonder why at times. I guess the only thing that we can do is accept what we have been dealt and change what we can and try to see the lessons that we learn from all of this craziness.

We can pray to be the support we all need from each other. We can find happiness, we deserve to be happy. That is what our Heavenly Father would want for us.

It is interesting to me that my friend sent me this song tonight. I had just written my feelings down the other day and it was about choosing to swim or drown when problems come our way.

I hope I never become that person that is too busy or doesn't want to be involved in someone else's pain. I don't want to drown and I don't want anyone else to either. The ocean is huge and no one should be out there trying to survive alone.

Thank you Ryan for sharing the words to this song with me tonight. I know you will be okay and I know you will do well because "we" need you to be so you can continue to inspire us all.

Now lets start swimming!!! There are brighter days ahead for us all :)

You've gotta swim, swim for your life
Swim for the music that saves you
When you're not so sure you'll survive

You gotta swim and swim when it hurts
The whole world is watching
You haven't come this far to fall off the earth

The currents will pull you away from your love
Just keep your head above

I found a tidal wave begging to tear down the dawn
Memories like bullets, they fired at me from a gun
Crack in the armor, yeah

I swim for brighter days despite the absence of sun
Choking on salt water
I'm not giving in, I swim

You gotta swim for nights that won't end
Swim for your family as your lovers, your sisters
And brothers, and friends

Yeah, you gotta swim through wars without cause
Swim for the lost politicians
Who don't see their greed as a flaw
The currents will pull us away from our love
Just keep your head above

I found a tidal wave begging to tear down the dawn
Memories like bullets, they fired at me from a gun
A crack in the armor, yeah

I swim for brighter days despite of the absence of sun
Choking on salt water
I'm not giving in, well, I'm not giving in, I swim

You gotta swim, swim in the dark
There's no shame in drifting
Feel the tide shifting and wait for the spark

Yeah, you gotta swim, don't let yourself sink
Just find the horizon
I promise you, it's not as far as you think

The currents will drag us away from our love
Just keep your head above
Just keep your head above, swim
Just keep your head above, swim, swim
Just keep your head above, swim

I Hope You Dance!!!

My baby has hit her half way mark!!!!

Kylee went to China in January to teach little children English and to show them a bit of what life is like here in the United States.

It has been an awesome experience for her and the other teachers that she shares the apartment with.

Even though I miss her I would not change a thing. For the first time in her life she has been able to really do something just for herself . Kylee has always worried about others well being and now it is time for her to grow and benefit from what life has to offer.

The experiences that she has had and the memories and friendships she has made are priceless. It will be very hard for her to come home when the time comes.

The children adore her, who wouldn't, she is just like a grown child and everything is better when she is around! We love you Kylee and are so proud of you!!!!

We had a going away party for Kylee a few nights before she left.

So many people showed up and supported her decision to go.

Family and friends were so wonderful donating money for this experience of

a life time.

Kylee worked very hard saving her money so she could go and volunteer her time.

It was a team effort that she will benefit from forever.

We made all different food that the Asian store told us would be unique to China.

After tasting it, we would like it to stay in China...

We will keep our Chinese food American style, as we know it !!!!

My house smelled for days... I can't even begin to describe the smell!!!

The shrimp chips (a fav. in China) to say the least , was interesting.

The desserts were very dry, more like crackers.

I found myself explaining to everyone that entered that it was for

the experience and not because we liked the taste!

We passed around several shots of about 6 juice drinks...

I want to say one was, seaweed, cucumber, passion fruit, dragon fruit etc.

There was about twelve people doing the shots...

We lost a few to the toilet!!!!! Kylee being one of them.

But shared huge gut busting laughs!!!

The looks on their faces after downing it were priceless

Watching the beads of sweat forming on their foreheads from the anticipation was awesome

But watching most of them gag and try not to lose it was so fantastic

that it made us search out for more unsuspecting victims at the party.

We liked torturing each other and our guests!

It was a fun time!!!!

Kylee and I stayed up all night packing her suitcase.

I enjoyed spending that quiet one on one time with my baby,

I wanted to make sure she had everything she needed since I wouldn't be there.

I checked everything on the list twenty times making sure I didn't miss anything

Moms do that ya know

I began to cry at about 3:30 a.m. She really was leaving and it was hard!

She asked me to not cry because it would make it harder for her.

I stopped... but only for her

I was beyond exhaustion but I wouldn't have traded it for the world!

It reminded me of the nights before my boys left for their mission.

It meant something to me to make sure they were ready.

I can't explain it but it is more then just packing a lot of stuff in a suitcase for your child.

It's something special, kind of spiritual in a strange way

It sounds weird but almost like a type of ritual...

Someday it will make sense.

I wrote secret letters to her and hid them in her suitcase.

I hid some things she said she didn't need ( I knew she would)

I gave her some charms with Chinese symbols on them for Christmas

I was hoping it would bless her with

SAFETY, LOVE, KNOWLEDGE, FREINDSHIP

and STRENGTH

She came up with the great idea to put them on a chain

She wears it every day!!!

We shopped for days before not knowing what they would have over there.

We do know that they don't have Tampons over there and the toothpaste tastes like

poop!

It's kinda hard figuring out how many of the girlie things ya might need for 6 months.

Being a mom, I worried that the other girls didn't know that you can't get them in China.

So I packed some extras for them just in case!

Moms do that...

You can't go without those things for sure... at least not American women !!

We headed for the airport with two large suitcases

One loaded with her stuff

The other with school supplies that she would need to teach.

She met some of the girls at the airport

I worried and wondered who she would connect with

Moms do that ya know... they worry

I wanted everyone to see what we see in her

The special things about her... the reasons we love her

How fun she is and always the life of the party

The tough I can kick anyones butt side, and the

loving, gentle, I would do anything for you side.

I prayed they would see that in her and appreciate what she has to offer.

All the girls looked a bit nervous saying goodbye

Kylee was quiet so I figured she was nervous too.

Of course I asked her if there was anything wrong?

My mouth just blurts it out when people are quiet

I'm trying to get better about that!!!

I reminded her where everything was a 1, 000 more times

She told me "Mom, I know you showed me a million times."

I might have!!!

Mom's tend to do that

We took pictures

I look like an ostrich trying not to pass gas!!!

Ty, Kylee and Amber

Max, Briana, Jack and Adam

( Adam's ''I look constipated' pose was inherited from his mother)

We are unable to relax and smile like normal people...

You are still cute Adam even if you do look constipated!

Cameron and Jessica

Adam and Brooke

Special kisses from her nephews Jack

and Jace!!!

a few tears... that's all she would allow us to shed.

Besides we weren't sad, we were very excited for her

and thrilled that she chose to do this!

This was going to be great!!!

All her brothers and sisters also wrote letters of encouragement and love and

secretly stuffed them in her travel bag so she could find them on the plane.

I watched as she inched her way up the security line.

She had never traveled anywhere alone before.

I have always been the tour director

She was on her own now

She told me "Mom, I'm fine." as if she was a little embarrassed

that her mom was still watching her from afar.

I knew at that point, that it was my time to turn and walk away,

she's not my baby anymore

I needed to let her go.

So I did... I walked away

Just then, Briana said "Jen, Kylee's calling for you"

I thought maybe she wanted to say one last goodbye,

I turned back towards her trying to find her in the long line.

She had made it up to the security desk...

She had a panic look on her face !!!!! Her eyes looked like a deer in the headlights!!!

"Where's my Passport""???

"Mom, mom, where is it?"

I gently reminded her by pointing to the pouch around her neck that held

all her important documents.

The same place, that we rehearsed over and over and over again until she said

"Mom, I know, you've told me a thousand times!!"

I could have said something about being right

But I didn't...

After giving me that oops, ha, ha embarrassed look she walked through security.

She turned back one last time, with her face now relaxed and mouthed the words

"I LOVE YOU"

That's when I felt the bittersweat tears start to flow...

I just watched my baby as she jumped from the nest

The nest that she felt warm in, loved in and where she felt protected from danger.

She took that first leap,

She stumbled,

But she got back up and took off again

This time spreading her wings and flying completely on her own

To places she has never been before , to see the things I could have never shown her

and to gain the knowledge about life that's beyond what I could ever teach her.

My daughter was becoming a woman, a Beautiful Woman,

and she makes me proud!!!!

****I didn't go in her room for two days but when I did I laid on her bed and thought

about how happy I was for her and how fast the time would go. She would be home

before we knew it and then she would be onto her next adventure as if she never left. I was proud of myself for holding up so well with a now very empty house. I almost felt a little guilty that I was not feeling sad at all. I turned on my side and saw a picture of her.

So what, maybe I cried a little or a lot... but hey,

That's what mom's do!!!

2 comments:

CORY said...

This post makes me want to baul my eyes out. I laughed out loud at the "I could have said something about being right... but I didn't" part. So funny.

Kylee has always been amazing. She is such a sweet girl. You are pretty amazing too. Mom's are amazing because that's what they do.

April 14, 2011 11:41 AM

Britanna and Kev said...

Shucks, Jen. You made me cry....It makes me think of my mom own mom when I moved to college and when I got married. I love moms. Thanks for always bringing us in to your family too, I love you guys. :)

April 15, 2011 9:03 AM